Jun 222012
 

So this morning I decided to take a nap.  I usually don’t take naps because they never end well, and this was no exception.  However, considering that I finished my dissertation last week and couldn’t face cleaning the kitchen just yet, it seemed like a good idea at the time.

It must be pointed out that thanks to Cracked.com, I watched this video yesterday:

There is not much to say about that, other than, quite obviously, it will burn a hole into your subconscious and bury itself there like one of those parasitic flukeworms.  So you have been warned.  Sorry if you already watched it and didn’t heed this warning, but that’s not my problem.

Anyway, I did happen to fall asleep, in my bed, only to wake up in some alternate reality where I lived in an apartment in a high rise somewhere.  That wasn’t so bad, except I couldn’t find my dog.  I knew my kids were on a field trip, but the dog was nowhere to be found.  Then a cop knocked on the door, and said, “Would you come with me, please?”  I followed him through this vertical maze-like labyrinth, and then he turned around and was a zombie, so I decided to make haste.  Luckily, I could fly, so I flew back to the apartment and decided to take a nap.

Here is where it got sticky.  While I was taking a nap, I was accosted by a bear.  I did some kung fu moves on it and the bear turned into a bunch of bats.  I decided that I needed to wake up from this dream, which was in this other dream, and I couldn’t do it.  I told myself to wake up, I tried to open my eyes with my fingers, and I flailed around within the dream.  To no avail.

So then I told myself, “Now you’ve gone and done it.  You are in a freaking coma.  Your family is probably gathered around your bedside wondering when you will ever wake up.”

I decided to just relax and wait for Leonardo DiCaprio to show up, but just then, I emerged from the dream, expecting to be in my apartment in the sky, only to find myself back in this reality, with no zombies or bears in sight.  Then it took me a few seconds to place where I was exactly.  Then I went back to sleep.

There is no lesson in this other than taking naps during the day may mess with your psyche.  And bears in any realm are murderous killing machines with supernatural powers.

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